A Shift in Paradigm
by suezahn
Summary: Nine months after events on Endor's moon, Leia ponders why she's not satisfied... Inspired by a throw-away line from "Into the Fire." Part of my Kismet series.


**A Shift in Paradigm**

By Susan Zahn

_Disclaimer: Much as I'd love to be able to retire and live off the proceeds from these stories, I sadly do not own the rights to these brilliant characters. Maybe if you put in a good word for me…?_

_Author's Note: This story is part of a broader story arc, my "_Kismet_" series, that I've been developing over the past two decades—long before any of the prequels, EU books, or other materials came out. While I occasionally borrow proper names from these newer sources (for convenience' sake) I feel no compunction to make my stories conform to any "canon" other than the original saga films. I hope you can enjoy them in the same spirit of freedom that I have felt writing them._

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One word frees us of all the weight and pain of life: That word is love.

-Sophocles (496 BC - 406 BC)

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The spacious penthouse suite granted an impressive view of an exclusive section of Coruscant's capital center, and bright sunlight flooded through the arched one-way transparisteel skylight to bathe the bedroom in comfortable warmth. Lying stretched out on his back atop a tangle of sheets, his hands up and tucked behind his head, Han Solo wallowed in the luxury of a rare lazy afternoon. Relaxed and sated, he imagined he had a bit of a foolish grin on his face, but his companion looked just as content at the moment, so at least it was mutual. Sprawled out next to him on her stomach, with chin resting on intertwined fingers upon her pillow and one shapely calf and foot up in the air rocking back and forth, Leia Organa-Solo hummed along with the soft music playing in the background, her thoughts far away.

_No better way to spend a day off, _he thought. _A guy could get used to this._

In the nine standard months since the decisive battle above Endor's moon and the subsequent collapse of the Empire, marriage had permanently intertwined their lives, and yet too often they were separated by duty. When he wasn't off conducting an inspection or planning and supervising maneuvers, she was involved in peace negotiations or other governance responsibilities that kept her away for long days and even longer nights at a stretch. There had been no time for a proper honeymoon, not unless one counted these rare simultaneous days off—which he didn't and he was pretty sure she didn't, either.

Still, Han treasured these days when they came. After all, he'd forsaken most of his old life and courted this fantastic woman for a reason. The pleasure of getting to know her better with time, as she allowed him into the barriers of self-protection she'd maintained for so long, was something he found endlessly fascinating and compelling. Even as he'd been prepared to invest whatever time was necessary to draw her out of that defensive shell, she'd surprised him with her enthusiasm and passion in abandoning it. It shouldn't have been a surprise, though; he'd always suspected she might throw as much ardor and energy into their relationship as she did with anything else she took on, and the joy in witnessing her awakening into her own womanhood, with him, still made him glad he'd stuck around during the lean years when she'd rebuffed him. It was during days like this when he reaped the rewards for his obstinacy.

_Yep, no better way._

Still staring up at the sky, letting random thoughts pass through his mind as if they were attached to and trailing behind the flying craft that crossed his view from time to time, he sighed and moved a hand to scratch the side of his nose, then tucked it back behind his head. Then his wife stirred and propped herself up on her elbows to look down at him. His eyes shifted to meet her dark ones, waiting in anticipation for whatever she might propose. He did have a couple of ideas, but was always willing to let her take the lead…

Leia seemed to hesitate, as if worried that once she voiced her thoughts it would be too late to take the words back. "Han, are you happy?"

Startled by the question—that wasn't remotely where his thoughts had been going—he lifted his head up a little to look closer at her. "What?"

"Are you happy?"

Now feeling a little bemused, he grinned. "Sweetheart, I don't know what _you've_ been doing all day, but…"

That drew a chuckle out of her before her serious attitude returned. "No, no, I mean in general."

Han's internal alarm went off like a hull breach klaxon and he considered his next words very carefully —although still a newlywed, even he knew better than to walk into that potential trap unprepared. "I'm happy whenever I'm with you."

One corner of her mouth drew up. "Thank you, but that was a dodge."

He chewed the inside corner of a cheek, scrutinizing her expression, trying to decipher her hidden agenda. "Why do I get the feeling this question is more about you than about me?"

With a sigh, Leia shrugged in admittance. "Maybe it is. I think spending a day like this with you just drives home the point. I never thought I'd live long enough to see the end of the war and find my own happiness. It wasn't a priority because the chance seemed so remote…and now…Now I've beaten the odds, so I should feel more satisfied, and yet I'm not."

Surprised by the confession, and desperately attempting to ignore the sudden chill of uncertainty that settled in his stomach, Han rolled onto to his side and up onto an elbow to face her. He wasn't sure he wanted clarification, but then he'd never been one to hang back. "Not satisfied with us?"

She paused, as if suddenly losing her train of thought, and then realization dawned on her face. She shook her head and reached over to quickly grip his wrist where it draped over his hip, squeezing it to reassure. "No, no! That's the only thing I _am_ sure about. No, it's…" She hesitated again, now visibly torn as she released him. "It's my career."

"Ohhh." He waited for her to elaborate. She _had_ seemed a little preoccupied of late, the times he'd been with her outside of their bedroom.

"I'm not sure anymore that I want to give what everyone wants from me. I don't…I think they're trying to push me in a direction I don't want to go."

"You're having second thoughts about running for office," he summed up.

Nodding, Leia pushed herself upright and sat cross-legged to look down at him. "The young woman I was years ago in the Senate…that's not not me anymore. You know that."

"Yeah, I know." He allowed a hint of lascivious teasing in his voice as he let his eyes rove over her naked form, but then he sobered and reached up with his free hand to tuck a dangling tendril of hair behind her ear. "What are they pushing you to do?"

"Well, not Mon Mothma—she's _still_ not happy with how I left to help rescue you. She's made it pretty clear that I can't be trusted—"

"Well, she's a bitter dried-up old—" Han started with his usual rant, but Leia cut him off with faultless timing.

"BUT…some of the others are dropping hints, trying to stir up support."

That sounded ominous. "Support for what?"

Sighing again, Leia scratched her head in annoyance. "Some sort of Cabinet position, or even higher. Goddess forbid, one of them is even proposing the Chancellorship. 'The first female Chancellor!'"

His wife said that last bit with a mock pomposity and over-exuberance that normally would have made Han laugh—she could play him like a Kandel harp sometimes—but instead he remained silent, watching her expression, trying to sort out his own feelings about the idea as well as gauge her mood.

Were people really pushing for her to take on that role? He had no doubt she could do the job, but it would probably kill her in the process, between the burden and stress and her own tendency to not delegate. Not to mention he barely got to enjoy her company as it was, and this possible change in the precarious balance would all but guarantee their private lives would become non-existent. If that was what it took to make her happy…he supposed he'd have to find a way to cope somehow. Still, it was a grim thought and he worried how his own happiness fit into the equation.

As if sensing his train of thought—whether it was due to her Jedi lineage or just growing familiarity with him was hard to tell—Leia shook her head and leaned in toward him. "Han, I don't _want_ it! I never had that sort of ambition, even when I was young. I ran for the Senate seat because Bail Organa encouraged me to do so, and because I hoped to change things from the inside when I still thought there was a chance through peaceful means. That path didn't work, but in the end we still triumphed. But this…this would mean admitting that it will never end because there will _always_ be something to fix, always some new crisis needing my full attention. You told me—Goddess knows how many times—that I had to stop thinking I could save this galaxy single-handed, and you were right! It has to stop. There are plenty of others out there who want the job more than me, and I'm not willing to fight them for it. And I'm certainly not willing to drag you and Luke and everyone else I love through the nightmare of a nasty election campaign—and it _would_ get nasty—just to get the job… In the end it would only take me away from you once more, and I don't ever want to be that unhappy again."

As Han had listened to her little speech, a gradual wave of relief swept over him. It was quite obvious now that she'd put a lot of thought into this, and he felt a little ashamed at his own selfish glee upon hearing her decision, although the feeling didn't last long. The solution seemed obvious now and he shrugged. "Then don't be. Tell them all to go to hell."

She laughed and then bent over to give him a quick peck on the lips. "Well, maybe not exactly in those words."

"Why not? It leaves no doubt."

"True, but I don't want to burn bridges, either. I still want to be involved on some level, but just not that high up. I think, for the first time in my life, I'm happy to take a back seat. I want to have a life that involves more than just stolen moments with you. I know that's selfish, but I can't help it. I want more days like _this_."

"That's the spirit." He let his fingers caress her closest knee, returning the sentiment as he enjoyed the contour and sensation of her skin. "A shame we can't collect paychecks doing _this_ all day…"

She gave him a beady-eyed look. "I'm not even going to comment on that."

"But you'd like to…"

Leia recognized that was a challenge, and she took a long pause to deliberately peruse the length of his body from toes to head. "I'd expect top billing and more credits, but I know your ego. It would never work."

Pleased all over again that this woman was his partner for life, Han chuckled. Still lying on his side facing her with his head propped on up one hand, he reached and playfully tugged her down toward him with the other. She tipped over on her hip until coming to rest leaning up against his stomach, and then idly stroked a hand up his back and around the curve of his shoulder.

"Okay," Han went on. "So, you've ruled out the Chancellorship _and_ a promising career in erotic holovids. Does that mean you're reconsidering Luke's option?"

Leia stiffened for just an instant before recovering quickly. "No. The few times I've tried…it…" She shook her head, suddenly not willing to meet his eyes, clearly still not comfortable with the entire concept. "It frightened me. I still have too much anger, and I don't know if that will ever go away completely. He's better off doing what he's doing, looking for better candidates. Besides, a Master really needs to establish a personal distance from the apprentice to maintain an air of authority, and it's way too late for that with us. We're too close, and we're family."

Han nodded, realizing he understood that better than he usually did whenever the topic of conversation verged into Force territory. Luke Skywalker had seemed a little more slow to accept this reasoning months ago when he'd proposed the idea, but ultimately had agreed and hadn't mentioned it again. Han knew she had adopted one or two lessons from her Jedi brother, particularly the meditation exercises that had significantly reduced her stress levels and enhanced her natural intuitions, but she seemed content to leave it at that, and he was grateful—he would have loved her no matter what her choice, but the whole idea of relying on factors you couldn't see or touch or hear still made him uncomfortable. She was mysterious enough already, thank you very much.

"Well, I did have one idea," she drawled in an attempt at sounding spontaneous, but making it clear that she'd already thought this through as well. He wouldn't have recognized her if she hadn't already done her homework. "There's a position in development right now. There's really no solid definition to the role yet, but it's mine to mould if I want it."

"Umhmmm…" he prompted her to go on, smiling as he recognized the little spark of enthusiasm in her eyes.

"They need someone to seek out bids for government contracts on military supplies and general manufacturing. Someone who can reach out to many of the companies that used to work exclusively for the Empire, as well as find new opportunities. It could just be a consultant role, if that's all I wish it to be."

"Ahhh, I see. Not all that different from what you were doing before the collapse, but above-board this time."

"That's right, just safer and legal now."

"You've already got the experience and some reputation."

"Yes, that's true…" She lost a little momentum, her gaze going distant once more.

"But…?"

After a moment, she refocused on him. "It will still mean a lot of traveling, at least initially."

"I know where this is heading." Han rolled away and then sat up beside her. Leaning back on his straightened arms, he nodded. "And with my schedule…"

"Exactly."

"We're back into that not-so-happy territory again."

"Well…that's why I asked if _you_ were happy."

Things finally clicked into place for Han, and he saw where this had been leading all the long. "You want to know if I'm happy about taking my commission."

As if she only now realized how that might sound, after all those years of pushing him to officially join and accept a rank in the first place, Leia dipped her head in embarrassment. "I sound like such a hypocrite…"

Han shook his head and tried to assuage her doubts. "Nah, you're not a hypocrite. Like you said, people change. Look, I didn't take that commission _just_ because of you, Sweetheart. Sure, I wanted to show you I was serious, but…the Alliance needed trained leaders and I had nothing better lined up at the time, so I helped out."

Despite her current mood, the hint of a teasing smile played across her face. "And I'm very grateful you were able to fit it into your busy schedule. But be honest…"

Wondering once again how carefully he should choose his words, Han decided to just go with his gut and fly full-throttle. "All right, Leia. I don't think I'm cut out to be a career man in the military. I did what I joined up to do—the _Death Star_'s destroyed and the Empire's finished. I'm not crazy about becoming a desk jockey, but I'll stay at it if it's what works best for you."

"But that's my point!" she burst out, a frown marring her smooth features. "This shouldn't just be about _my_ happiness. It should be about _us_. It would crush me to think you're languishing in a job you hate, and Goddess knows it wouldn't be fair to you. We need to find a compromise, together."

Touched by her admission and consideration for him, he sat up all the way and kissed her for a long moment, then drew back. "So far I'm with you."

"Perfect. That's exactly what I had in mind."

He tipped his head in curiosity, recognizing a set-up.

"I'd be traveling a lot, sometimes to the Outer Rim or even the Corporate Sector for extended negotiations. I'd need a pilot and escort on my staff. Why couldn't he be my infinitely qualified and fully pardoned husband? Assuming he's interested in the position, of course…"

Han paused a long moment to let the idea sink in, while a slow-burning smile spread across his face. "Not much different from what I used to do, either, huh?"

"Oh, I think it could be _very_ different…" she responded in a purr as she trailed a finger from his shoulder across his chest and down toward his belly.

He couldn't say if it was her touch, the sudden seductive hint in her voice, or the simple but thrilling idea of flying again, but his body voted in unanimous and obvious agreement. "You know, Princess, I like the way you think."

"You mean you didn't just marry me for my looks?"

"No, I married you for your money. I _sleep_ with you for your looks."

With a growl, Leia gave him a playful shove and he flopped back onto the bed. His triumphant laugh was quickly choked off by a groan as she took matters into her own hands.

"Solo, you're pushing your luck." Shifting onto her knees, she leaned over him and her lips followed the trail her fingers had blazed. "We haven't even negotiated a payment contract yet…"

The End


End file.
